


chasing shadows

by Queenslittlesister



Category: Queen (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-16 22:15:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29831697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queenslittlesister/pseuds/Queenslittlesister
Summary: Freddie Mercury,a single gay man of the 80s,in love with the bands guitarist,Brian may but Freddie's past creeps up on him,Brian's there to help him through it,Freddie falls in love with Brian but Brian's married to Chrissie Mullen with kids.Freddie and Brian start an affair with each other when Chrissie finds out,she tries to blackmail Freddie.
Relationships: Brian May/Freddie Mercury
Kudos: 3





	1. Chapter 1

** _Freddie Mercury,a single gay man of the 80s,in love with the bands guitarist,Brian may but Freddie's past creeps up on him,Brian's there to help him through it,Freddie falls in love with Brian but Brian's married to Chrissie Mullen with kids.Freddie and Brian start an affair with each other when Chrissie finds out,she tries to blackmail Freddie.  
_ **

** _Scotty Adams:Fifty five(deceased)_ **

** _.............._ **

** _Danny adams:fifty five_ **

** _Freddie Mercury:37_ **

** _Brian may:thirty six_ **

** _Roger taylor:34_ **

** _John Deacon:32_ **

** _......................................_ **

** _June 9th 1983(Monday)_ **

** _Freddie's p.o.v_ **

Hi,i'm Freddie Mercury,thirty seven year old gay man and single.I'm in love with my bands guitarist,i live in brighton,hours away from where my bandmates live.I live here with my parents,Danny Adams(Daddy/dad) and scotty adams(papa,papi),dad's a paramedic and works at the Royal Sussex County Hospital here in Brighton.papa's also a paramedic and works at the same hospital as dad.I love my adoptive parents.

yes,they adopted me.Right now,i'm in the studio in London with my bandmates."Freddie!Freddie!FREDERICK!",that snapped me out of my thoughts."sorry",i mumble."you okay?you've been quiet this whole time",Brian says to me."yeah,i'm fine Brian",i lied.The phone rang,i answered....

** _......................._ **

_**Danny:Darling,you gotta come home now,your other father is in the hospital,he** _ **_'s been taken ill with the flu_ **

**_Freddie:Daddy,i am at work you know_ **

**_Danny:i know Freddie,just please,he wants to see you so much._ **

**_Freddie:fine,give me three and a half hours_ **

**_................................  _ **

"i'm gonna have to cut this short",i say."again?!",Roger snaps."my papa's ill you dick!he's in the hospital,i've been called to see him,i'm not gonna deny that!",i say."i'll come with you",Brian offers."you don't have to",i say."i have a two hour train ride there",i say."Freddie,i don't mind,i haven't met your parents yet",he says."fine",i gave in.

I grab my jacket so does Brian."so what's it like living by the sea?",he asked."Really nice actually Brian,proper sea view.I live right by the sea",i say,i show him a photo of my parents house."wow",he says."I know,sea view,can go to the beach anytime i want",i smile,"show off",he says."shut up lion boy",i tease.he pushed me.We got on the train,Thameslink train.

After Two and a half hours,the train pulled into brighton station.Brian and i got off and made our way to the Royal Sussex County hospital,"Taxi!",i call one.we got in,i paid the fare in advance.After thirty minutes,the taxi pulled up outside the hospital.Brian and i got out.We walked in,i took a breath and went straight to the emergency ward.I knocked on the door."come in",i hear the voice of my dad."Hi dad",i say."papi?",i say,he sat up,i hugged him,he kissed my forehead."Dad,papi,this is Brian,my best friend and bandmate,he offered to come here with me",i say."Danny,Freddie's dad",dad says."Scotty,his other father",papa says.

"Brian,Freddie's mate and bandmate",Brian says."papa",i say,my arms crossed."what happened",i ask."well,your papa got sick the flu since yesterday night,he collapsed in our room,i brought him here,he's not allowed leave until he completes his first round of antibiotics which is a week long,two a day",dad says."papa",i sigh."i know darling",he says,he pulled me back onto his hospital bed."let me go!",i giggle."Nah",he teased."please",i pout,he does."love you papa and dad,keep an eye on him",i say."you know i will",dad says."i'm thirty seven,don't forget that",i say."we wont,we raised you since you were five",papa says.

I nodded,kissing my parents cheeks,they hugged me.Brian and i left.

"fuck,they can be childish",i roll my eyes."they're your parents",Brian says."I know and i love them,they adopted me when i was five,i haven't even moved out yet,i don't think they want me to",i say."course they don't,they don't want to lose their little baby",Brian says,pinching my cheeks,i swat his hands away.We got on the train back to london.After two and half hours,it pulled into the station.Brian and i rushed off to the studio.

We got there,the other two were still here."back already?",Roger teased."shut up",i say."i'm not in the mood for your stupid games",i snapped,i will admit,i'm worried about my papa."oh don't be baby Freddie,just because your parents are in the hospital,doesn't mean you have an attitude",Roger says."really now?!My own papa,collapsed at home last night,i wasn't there!he's in the hospital for a severe case of flu Roger!i have every right to be like this,i'm worried,you'd be the same",i snapped."leave him alone",John says to Roger.

"he has no right to be so moody!",the blonde dick says."shut up Roger before i kick your balls",i hissed."Freddie,go cool off",Brian says."don't fucking need to",i say.I left to go home to brighton,i took another two and a half hour train there.I got off,went home,i got to where i live with my parents.I let myself in and shut the door behind me changing into a T shirt and jeans,i grab my sunglasses,slip on my trainers and left the house,locking up.

I went and bought something for my papa,lets say its a bunch of flowers and a teddy bear.I walk to the hospital,its not far from the beach.I got there,let them know it was for my parent.I went to see my papa again."hello you",dad says."bought them for papa"i say.Dad hugged me despite me being thirty seven,with a moustache and a singer in a band.

"awe",he says."hi papa",i say,i put the flowers in the vase by his bed and the teddy next to them.i kiss his cheek and sat with him."We make a perfect family",i smile."yeah we do",dad says."Dad go home,rest,i'll stay tonight",i say."you don't have to",he tried to argue with me."Aren't i always right",i say cheekily.he sighs and kisses my cheek.

he went home."Freddie bear",papa says."no arguments,i'm staying,i'm not going to work tomorrow,they can shove it for a day without me",i say.I notice my papa's breathing going.i hit the call button and watch the machine,his heart rate was going too.the nurses and doctors came in.then i hear it......the long line of a death machine.the doctor came out."i i is he okay?",i ask."i'm sorry,he didn't make it",the doctor says,i nodded.

I wipe my eyes and took the flowers and teddy,i threw the flowers into the sea and kept the teddy.i made my way to london.I was upset,i just lost a parent,i told dad before i left,I got to london,well you already know how long.I went to Brian's.

I knock on his door."Chrissie",i say."what do you want",she asked."i want to talk to brian",i say."who's at the door?",i hear him ask."its your gay mate!",Chrissie says."shut up Christine",i hiss."Freddie,what happened",he asked,he came outside.We walked away."Freddie",he says."you know how my papa was in the hospital",i say,he nodded,"Well.....he died today",i say.

"i just lost a fucking parent",i cry,Brian pulled me into a hug."I don't wanna go home",i sniffle."Stay with me,i don't mind",he says."A are you sure,Chrissie hates me you know that",i say."she doesn't hate you Freddie,she's fucking pregnant",Brian says.i nodded.i had my spare clothes."can we tell the others tomorrow",i ask,"sure",Brian says.

We went back to his,i wipe my eyes,i was upset,i just lost my papa,i loved scotty so much,he made me happy so did danny,they gave me a home.I wasn't ready to let go of a parent yet.Brian lets us in."what is he doing here?",Chrissie asked."Chrissie,leave him alone alright?!he's upset,he's staying here for the night,i don't want him going home alone",Brian says.

i got the guest room.

** _June 10th 1983(Tuesday)_ **

"Good Morning Freddie",Brian says."mm",i grunted,i pick up the bear,i was dressed,already showered and blushed my teeth.i was crying all night.We had breakfast then set off to the studio.we got a taxi there.i kept the teddy with me.I miss my papa already.I wasn't going to his funeral,he was only fifty five he was thirty when they adopted me,i was five. 

the cab pulled up,Brian payed the fare,we got out,i grab the teddy bear.he opened the door for me,i bit my lip.I had written one song for papa,Love of my life,i never got to play it for him."what's got you in a grump",Roger asked me."piss off",i snap."you're early",he says."i slept at Brian's last night,i've had a rough night last night",i say."i know i look like shit",i hiss.i sat down."guys Freddie has something to tell you two,he's told me already",Brian says.

"you're not leaving are you?"John asked,"No,i'm not John.Well last night,i told you all i had a parent in the hospital,that very parent passed away last night",i say quietly"oh freddie",John says,hugging me."i don't want sympathy",i say."i probably wont be here for a few days",i say."that's fine Freddie,we understand,"John says.

"i kinda want you all to come with me,since i have a big arse house now",i say."in london or?",Roger says,"brighton dick head",i say."i live in brighton ain't moving to london anytime soon",i say."I plan to stay with my dad until he passes or whatever",i say."we'll come with ya",Roger says."tonight",i say.Brian and i took the first train to brighton,we got there waited for the other two to arrive. 

they soon arrive.We walked up where i live with my dad."told you i have a sea view",i boast."Stop it",Brian laughed.I let us in,dad was out,i understand."I know its a mess but its something",i say."this is huge",Roger piped up."of course Rog,my dad earns a lot...",i say.i put my stuff down."we simply all can't stay here",Roger says."oh really?i paid for a hotel you three,not far from here",i say.

"i'm jealous",John says,"so you should",i smirked.dad soon turned up."back already Freddie",he says,"yes dad i am",i say,"i brought my friends with me",i say."I don't mind",dad says.I took the three to the hotel."Brian and John first floor,rooms 103 and 104,Roger second floor room 204",i say,i gave them the keys.they go up to their rooms.

I went back home.I let myself in."dad,you okay",i ask.".I'm fine honey",he says"I Miss him too daddy",i say,he held out his arms,i flew into them.he held me there."i know you miss him dear,i do to so much,your papa and i have been together since we were sixteen so thirty nine years we've been together",dad says."we adopted you when you were five,scotty and i were thirty so Twenty five years since we adopted you,you're Thirty seven now,off in the world",he says."I know dad",i say.Dad is still fit for his age(hence the picture).

"he wanted you to have this",dad says."H His wedding ring",i say."indeed darling,he wanted you to have it",dad said to me,kissing my forehead,i put on my papa's wedding ring.

It is a gay wedding ring(LGBTQ+ Pride colours).I wipe my eyes.Dad kissed my forehead,i went to bed.

 ** _June 11th 1983(Wednesday)_**

"Good Morning darling",dad says,"Morning dad"i say.he made papa's favourite breakfast,banana pancakes with syrup.I ate it with dad by my side.the band have a tour soon.Dad rubs my back,he kissed my cheek,i got dressed for the day.I left to wait for the other three.they came out."okay today?",Brian asked,"yeah",i say,fiddling with the ring.

"what's with the ring?",he asked"oh,it was my papa's wedding ring,dad gave it to me since papa wanted me to have it",i say quietly.Brian nodded.I kinda wanted not to be in the studio.I wanted to spend a day on the beach,my parents love the beach."you coming to the studio",,Brian says.

"No,i kinda want a day to myself",i say."Freddie",Brian says."Brian,i'm grieving the loss of my papa",i snapped."Sorry sorry",he says. 

I nodded.i went and looked over the sea all my childhood memories came back.my first day with danny and Scotty,first day being shown my new home."are you okay?",John asked me."yeah John,i'm fine,just going back to my childhood i never got really,Danny And Scotty adopted me when i was five,its been Twenty five years today since i was first adopted by them.",i sighed.

"they were together for Thirty nine years,since they were sixteen.",i say.I wipe my eyes."you know,we do leave for tour today,we're late",John says.I nodded.We left for the airport.We got on the jet,i sat alone,curled up on a chair.I pulled a blanket on myself."are you feeling okay?",John asked.i shrug my shoulders."still upset?",he then asked,i nodded.he sat with me.

"It sucks John,its like nobody understand you,that's what it was like when danny and Scotty adopted me,nobody accepted me until i was sixteen",i say."oh Freddie",john says,hugging me."I never really got my full childhood,my parents and i moved to brighton when they first adopted me,they kept me in the house for weeks until i settled in,i was a shy boy as a five year old",i say.

"what are your parents like?",John asked."Well Scotty was the best,he spoiled me,love,gifts everything i asked for then Danny also spoiled me,he's more protective of me,i was a bit of klutz as a kid,one little scratch would make him panic",i giggle."wow",John says."i know,he's always been protective of me,he's my dad,he loves me like scotty did",i say.

The jet landed,we got off the plane.i grab my duffle bag.We all go to the hotel,i was sharing a room with Brian.Brian and i go up to our room.I put my bag down and go to the bathroom,i look at myself in the mirror."how are they ever proud of me",i mutter."Freddie?",Brian says.i don't answer him.

"Freddie,answer me",he says.I don't,i had been crying.the door is unlocked.he opened the door."what's wrong",he asked."Nothing Brian",i lied,i knew Brian would invite Chrissie on tour with us.....i spoke to soon."i'll uh leave",i say quietly."you don't have to",Brian says.i roll my eyes.

I left the hotel room and got myself a single room.I let myself into it,room 102,first floor.I shut the door behind me and locked it,we also have fucking Prenter with us.We all went down to the pub,Brian and i got super drunk....


	2. Whispers of fate

**_ June 12th 1983(Thursday) _ **

** _Freddie's p.o.v_ **

I woke up in someone's bed,not my own.Brian and i and Roger got shitfaced last night,i look over to my left.....Brian.Ugh,i got out of bed and dressed quickly."Well then good morning",that damn grin of a voice,"shut up",i snap"i can't fucking believe we slept together",i say."we never had sex Freddie,you were shitfaced,i had water",he says,"why did you let me drink?!i was planning on being clean from alcohol for the whole tour",i hiss.A knock at the door,i put on my shirt,i quickly brush my teeth and Brian opened the door.

"Brian fucking May",Chrissie says"don't look at me,he got me drunk",i say."BRIAN!",Chrissie yelled."i'll leave,again brian,don't ruin my sober streak",i say.I left their room."hey Freddie",Roger says,"yeah hi",i say."i heard Brian got you drunk",he says,"yes he fucking did,i promised my dad i wouldn't get drunk",i sigh.The lobby phone rings,i answered it.

** _...................._ **

**_Freddie:hello?_ **

**_Daddy:HOW DARE YOU GET DRUNK?!_ **

**_Freddie:daddy please,it was not my fault,Brian got me drunk last night_ **

**_Daddy:No excuses Freddie_ **

**_Freddie:Daddy...please,its not my fault.._ **

**_......................... _ **

He hung up on me......i had tears in my eyes.Brian came down."i fucking hate you Brian may so much,now my dad hates me!",i yell at him."he hung up on me because of you!",i say to him.John came down after."right after i lost a parent Brian,i didn't want to get drunk fuck you!"i say to him."i'm not continuing this tour,i'm going home",i snapped.

I got on a plane home to brighton,i got a taxi back to dads.I knock on the door,i had been crying,he answered,full well knowing how guilty i feel."Darling,i'm not mad",he says."seems like it dad",i say,he brought me into a hug."i'm not mad at you Freddie,i know you're Thirty Seven and all but Freddie",he says,"i know dad,i never intended to get drunk,Brian got me drunk,he switched the drinks",i say.

Dad kisses my forehead."I'm getting old",i say."you're thirty seven",he says."almost thirty eight",i say."i told them i refused to continue tour then i left to come here"i say."Freddie Adams Mercury",he says."I know",i giggle,he smirked,i knew the face,i started running around the house,dad chasing me,he's fucking fit.i out ran him."Boo",i hear from behind me,i squeaked."Squeaker",dad says.i huffed,not before starting to giggle,he had started tickling my sides.

"Dad!",i giggled."St stop it",i laughed."i love you dad,i'm thankful that you and papa adopted me,gave me a home,made me a rockstar dnd broke me from my little shy state",i say."we love you freddie,papa does so much,even if he's not here with us.he'll always be proud of you",dad says.I knew i was purposely delaying them."get back to wherever you were",he says.I didn't want to go alone."No",he says"please?i hate flying alone",i say."fine",he gave in,i packed up my duffle bag again.i had two tickets to New York,we are touring there.Dad and i got on the private jet."perks of being rich",i giggle,he smacked the back of my head as a warning.i sat down,window seat."Freddie,its alright darling",dad says."Dad",i hiss.

he rubs my back.we talked for the whole flight."if only papa was here dad,",i say."i know honey",dad says."i miss him dad,a lot",i whispered quietly."so do i Freddie so do i,he was the love of my life when i met him",he says,i nodded,we got off the plane.We went to the hotel,i was staying at,i have my own room.i checked out of it,i got the tour bus to myself.

Brian,John and Roger were in the lobby."I'm back",i say,"about time!",Brian says,"shut up.",i say."who's the geezer",Roger says,"ROGER!",i scold,"so its not okay to have my dad with me,since Brian got me drunk",i smirk."My dad looooves me",i say."that i do",dad says."unlike Brian's wife who hates me",i spat"Freddie",brian scolds,"whatever,its true,she hates me",i say.

I gave dad the key to my hotel room,102 first floor,he left for the room"right then,lets settle it,i'm allowed to have my dad with me,i've lost a parent,dads the only parent i have left,he's here to help me get over it and keep me from going insane",i say."Brian suck it up,Roger don't be rude",i say."John?",i say,"i don't care,i'm with freddie on this",he says,"thank fuck",i sigh a relief."he's allowed his only parents with him on this tour and tours to come,Roger you really can't be rude to Danny,he's a paramedic and will get you in trouble for assault,Brian don't be a dick",John says,"thank you John",i say."its fine",he says.

We were leaving to the studio.Dad came down,he had the kit.In case one of us got hurt.I needed dad at my side."Freddie....are you crying?",he smirked,"No"i lied"yes you are",he says,he wiped my tears."i miss him dad,its so hard",i sniffle"so do i darling",he says.he wrapped an arm around me,i caught Paul staring and glared at him.

We got to the studio."you'll see what i suffer with the idiots",i mumble.ten minutes later we were arguing."fucking hell Roger!",i yell.its for the 'Hard life' music video."No,i'm not wearing a neck ruffle!",he says."you have to!",i hiss,gritting my teeth then felt a sharp pain on my cheek and nose."ROGER",Brian scolded,i fell back."you asshole",i say."i....Freddie",he says,"save it",i say.Dad cleaned up my nose."ow",i whimper."stay still Freddie",dad says."it hurts dad",i say"i know it does",he says.he held the tissue to my nose while he popped it back in place,it took me a lot not to scream.

he splinted it.he squeezed my hand."i know it hurts Freddie",dad says,i wipe my eyes."don't cry",he says,"it hurts",i squeaked."I know",dad says,kissing my forehead,he helped me up.Paul walked in"what the fuck happened",he scowled.none of us answer him.Dad was in full uniform since again he's a paramedic.i leaned my weight on him."where have you been?",Paul asked me."fuck off Paul,nobody cares",i hiss."i've been with my dad",i say."This geezer",prenter snarled."oh Prenter,don't fucking test my patience",i snap.

"Freddie",dad warned me.I'm spoiled.We continued with recording."fucksake",i hiss."Roger just behave yourself",John says."shut up Deaky!",the blonde says."Roger",i lowly hiss."what",he says."why can't you just behave",i say."because",he sassed."don't sass me!",i snap.

"i can do whatever i want....... _bucky_ ",he says,i shook my head at him."Not cool",the other two say.Dad took me outside,he knows how sensitive i am."Darling",he says"i know daddy",i say."stop it",he smiled"No,i'll never stop calling you daddy",i say.he hugged me tightly."i love you dad",i say."i love you too darling,i'll never leave you for the world,you'll always be my son",he says."i'm just happy you and papa gave me a home when i was five and in a bad place",i say.

"so am i",dad smiled."you were spoiled as a kid,got everything you wanted",he added."i know dad,you and papa spoiled me rotten with everything",i say,he wiped my tears away."you'll always be my son,no matter what happens",he says.i wrap my arms around his neck.he kissed my forehead.Dad hugs me"i'd never give you up"he softly says"i know dad,i know you wouldn't give me up,you love me to much to do it,i love you too dad",i say.he kissed my forehead again.We went back into the studio."Daddy's boy!",Roger teased.

"shut up Roger",i say"i'm sick of your childish behaviour",i snap at him."can't you leave me alone for once,i'm happy my dads here,he understands me,helps me with my papa's death,you never seem to think before you speak,if you were me how would you feel if you lost a life long parent?!Once that took you in when you were orphan,that was me at age five,no parents living in an orphanage before two lovely people come along and adopt you!that was me,i got adopted by Danny And Scotty,they love me so much,I still miss Scotty,he loved me so much",i say.

"my dad loves me",i say as dad came behind me,hand on my shoulder."Freddie will always be my son",dad says"No matter what happens",i say.John spoke up."you two do make a perfect father and son",i nodded."thanks",i say."Danny will always be my dad",i say.he kissed my cheek."we love each other till the end",dad and i say together.he hugged me tightly.

the tour lasted a week.Then Dad and i went back to brighton.brian came with.Roger and John went back to london."it feels good to be home",i say."i know it does",Dad says.i went up to my room and flopped on my bed.Dad stood in the doorway."hug me daddy!",i giggle."No,you're not a child anymore",he says."please dad",i pout."No",he smiled."dad,hug me please,i need one",i pouted.he gave in."i love you dad",i say,burying my head in his chest."what's wrong?",he asked,putting me in his lap."i don't want to lose you like we did with papa",i sniffle."Darling,you'll never lose me i'm healthy enough to live,so are you",he says.

he wipes my tears away,kissing my forehead."i'll always been your dad",he says.he then started tickling my sides,i fell onto the bed as he kept tickling me."D dAd!St stap!",i laughed."No",he smirked,tickling my ribs then my underarms.I squealed."D Dad",i laugh."you always like it when i tickled you when you were little,you begged and begged me to tickle you",he says.he kept tickling me,i kick my legs,he sat on them.he then blew a monster raspberry on my stomach,i squealed loudly.

I laid on my bed,panting."i love you dad",i say."love you too",he says,he hugged me.I sat up."what're you thinking about?",he asked."i don't wanna lose you dad,you and papa were there for me,when i got bullied you both stood up for me,i broke my arm,you wouldn't let me do anything and did it for me,got sick,you care for me",i say."of course Freddie,i'm your dad,i always will be",he says.

Dad went to bed.I turn off my light after changing.I fell asleep.

 ** _June 13th 1983(Friday)_**

"Good Morning Darling",Dad says."Morning dad",i say.I rubbed my eyes.I sat at the kitchen island."are you feeling okay?",he asked,i shook my head,my eyes red and puffy,cheeks heating with a fever.Stomach hurting and it hurts to eat.Dad got out the thermometer."open wide",he says,i do,he puts it under my tongue,i shut my mouth.

he took it out a few minutes later."Fever",he says."back to bed mister",he says."yes dad",i say,i'm fucking Thirty seven who cares?Not me.I went back to bed.I stayed topless and in jogging bottoms.Dad soon came in.he put his hand to my forehead."warm",he says."i know dad,i'm sick",i coughed into my arm.

Dad kissed my head and rubbed my back gently."i feel like crap",i groaned."i know darling",he says."get some sleep,i don't want to hear a peep out of you",he says,i nodded,he turns off my light and shuts the door.I look to my window,i go over to it,Brian was outside,"what?",i say."let me in",he says,i shook my head."Freddie!",Dad says from downstairs,i got back in bed.i drank the tea dad gave me."Freddie adams!",dad shouts again,i miserably walk downstairs.

my cheeks were still burning hot.i then collapsed in dads arms.

**_ hours later(Royal Sussex county Hospital) _ **

I was waking up,bright lights,IV in my hand,connected to wires.Hospital."D Dad?",i stammer."i'm right here darling",he says."what happened",i groaned,sitting up."you collapsed,your fever got to high for your body to handle",he says.the doctor came in."Wh when will i be able to leave?",i ask."Not until you complete you're first round of antibiotics",he says,"Which is?",i then ask"A week",he says,i nodded.

I was stuck in hospital for a week.this sucks already,dad promised to stay but went home to grab my spare clothes.a knock on the door brought me out of my thoughts,"come in",i say."of course",i mutter."i wanted to apologise",Roger says,"go ahead",i say,"i'm sorry Freddie,really sorry",he says,i nodded."are you okay?you're never this quiet",he asked,"what do you think",i groaned."i'm sick Rog,i'm stuck here for a fucking week,i collapsed at home,now i'm stuck here",i say.

"do you want Brian?",he asked,i nodded with a pout.Brian then came in."Freddie,i'm sorry to",he says."its fine Brian",i say."i'm not going anywhere i can't",i say."do you want me to stay?",he asked,i nodded shyly."alright then i wont leave",he says."what happened?",he then asked."well,i'm sick with a high fever,i collapsed at home because my body couldn't handle my fever rising,i'm stuck here for a week until i complete a first round of antibiotics",i say."dads gone to get me spare clothes",i mumble.

he nodded."Freddie,i like you alot,Chrissie was only a distraction,i've divorced her",he says,"what?!",i say,before coughing hard and torturing my dry enough throat."will you go out with me?",he asked,i nodded.The nurse came in and gave me my first dose of antibiotics.Dad soon came back with my clothes and chucked me a T shirt,i put it on.he had work,he left.

Brian stayed with me.I needed company.I felt crappy."how come you didn't turn up yesterday?",he asked."Brian,i was with my dad,spending father and son time,my dad and i need each other sometimes,since papa died,its changed for us,dads lost his husband,i lost a father and parent,i took papa's wedding ring",i say.I got my second dose of medication that evening. 

"oh Freddie",Brian says,he sat on the bed with me,arm around me."i love you Brian",i say."i love you too",he says,planting a smack kiss on my cheek.We cuddled for the night.Brian's arms wrapped around me tightly.

**_ June 14th 1983(saturday) _ **

"good Morning boyfriend",i hear Brian says."Morning Brimi",i say.he kisses my cheek."do you want me to start a bath?",he asked,i nodded,the heart monitor sticky pads were taken off my chest,i'm not on a drip.I hadn't eaten or drank anything.I felt weak suddenly.Brian went to start a bath but caught me.he got me back on the bed,i pout."stop it Freddie,you're thirty seven",he says,"so?i'm sick",i say,the nurse came in and hooked me up to the IV fluid drip to get something into me.I needed to eat but i wanted to be sick as well if i eat."i'll go get us breakfast",he says.

"please",i say.Dad came in soon after,"how're you feeling",he asked,"Shitty dad shitty",i say.he raised an eyebrow at me once he noticed i was hooked on an IV fluids drip."almost fainted,i haven't eaten or drank anything"i admit."Freddie",he says,"i know dad,i feel shitty",i sighed,he kissed my forehead.Brian came in with breakfast for the two of us."Dad,you can stay,you're not interrupting",i say to him,i sat up more with a yawn.

"i think someone else is here to see you",dad says,he opened the door,my eyes widened."G G George M M Michael",i stammer."yeah,doesn't it bring back the time i took you to see him",dad says,i shook my head."i heard my favourite fan was sick",he says,i blushed and looked away pretending i wasn't blushing."We know you're blushing",George says,"am not",i mumble"you are",Brian says.the nurse came in,i got my first dose of medication.

the doctor came in."well since you're doing well with the medication,you're being discharged today",he says,i nodded and got dressed,brushed my teeth in the bathroom.I put on my trainers.Brian came up behind me,arms wrapped around my waist."i love you too",i say."come on,they're waiting",he says."i've always wanted to be with you",i growl playfully"me too",he says,we made out in the bathroom"alright love birds,"damn it George.

We came out,hair messed up,i ran my hand through my hair.Brian and i were both embarrassed.we were both too embarrassed to say anything,i was unhooked from the IV,the IV itself was taken out,my hand was wrapped in a bandage to keep it clean.

Just then we hear making out,Brian and i look up....i teared up and ran.Brian went after me,i was outside the room."how could he,my own dad days after my papa's death!",i say."Darling",dad"fuck off",i say."days after papa's death as well",i say."Darling",he softens,pulling me into a hug."look at me",he says,"No",i say"Freddie,look at me",he says again,i do."Darling,i'm still not over papa's death either.i think we both need a distraction,its worrying you too much as its me",he says,i nodded.he kissed my head and hugged me,i wrap my arms around his neck."i'm still your dad no matter what",he says."go,i'll be home soon",he says,i nodded,he kissed my cheek.

"i love you dad",i say."i love you too",he says.Brian and i left the hospital hand in hand.I took Brian back to my dads.Dad soon came home an hour later,Brian and i are in my room,making out,we hear moaning"Fucking hell!dads fucking George Michael",i groaned.we listened to it grinning."oh Danny,yes!",George moaned."oh fuck yes Danny!More!",he kept moaning,they aren't aware,we're listening."oh fuckkkk.i'm cumming",my dad then moaned.Brian and i fake gagged,giggling quietly.Dads fifty five.....George is Twenty fuck!

we hear them cleaning off and getting dressed.we opened my bedroom door and peeked out."we know you were listening to us fucking",dad says."be quieter next time",i giggle."Well then,i guess i'll teach you a lesson",dad smirked at me,i started running.he chased after me,i love this,father and son time,he ran in front of me,"put me down!",i say."No",he says.he had a strong grip on me."dad put me down",i whined,he smirked and pinned me to the floor,arms above my head,he tickled my sides with his free hand,i squealed and giggled,laughing under him.

he smiled at me."love you dad!",i got out between my giggles."love you too son",he says.he kept tickling me."d Dad!St stap it!",i laughed,"No!",he says,"this'll teach you not to listen on me having sex",he says,"ew!",i say.he tickled my sides harder."awe a little ticklish are we?",he teased.i kept laughing as he tickled me,i saw his hand trailing up my side to my armpit,i try to avoid it,he tickled me.he blew a raspberry.I was worn out,he gave in.I laid there,panting.i was barely able to sit up.Dad pulled me up,i sat against the sofa.

Dad held out his arms for me,i dash into them."i love you so much never leave me dad ever i mean it"i say"i wont leave you darling,ever,i promise,now forever,eternity,i wouldn't ever dare leave you Freddie,you're my only son",he says.I was crying by this point,dad wipes away my tears."i'll always fucking love you,always",he says.he rubs my back softly,i hid my face in the crook of my his neck."please dad,don't ever leave me ever,i don't want to lose you,i really don't want to lose you",i cry."shh,its okay,you wont lose me",he says.he played with my hair.

"I don't want to lose you dad,i love you so much,you and papa cared for me",i sniffle."that's because papa and i love you Freddie,i'm sure he's proud of you now",dad says."me too dad,he'll be proud of both of us,he loves us",i sniffle."he does",dad says,kissing my forehead."you wouldn't ever lose me darling,i'll always be here for you",he says.

"i love you dad to much to lose you",i say."i love you too darling,",he says,cupping my cheeks gently."i wouldn't ever leave you",he promised."i promise darling",he smiled,i felt his hand creep to the back of my head,cradling gently,his other hand rubbing my back softly."love you",i mumble."love you too",he says.Then a knock at the door goes.Brian answered.

I was still in my dads arms.Roger and John were at the door.Dad and i didn't let go of each other.he held me,i was still upset."look at me honey",dad says,i shook my head but dad cupped my cheeks,kissing my forehead.I wrote a song for papa but dad didn't get to hear it.i pull away from dad and went to the piano,i wipe my eyes.

**_ Love of my life, you've hurt me  
You've broken my heart and now you leave me  
Love of my life, can't you see?  
Bring it back, bring it back  
Don't take it away from me, because you don't know  
What it means to me _ **

**_ Love of my life, don't leave me  
You've stolen my love, you now desert me  
Love of my life, can't you see?  
Bring it back, bring it back (back)  
Don't take it away from me  
Because you don't know  
What it means to me _ **

**_ You will remember  
When this is blown over  
Everything's all by the way  
When I grow older  
I will be there at your side to remind you  
How I still love you (I still love you) _ **

**_ I still love you  
_ **

**_ Oh, hurry back, hurry back  
Don't take it away from me  
Because you don't know what it means to me  
Love of my life  
Love of my life  
Ooh, eh (alright) _ **

I finished the whole song without crying."darling",dad says,i bolt to him in tears."I....fuck..i wrote it for papa",i say."awe sweet boy",dad says softly,i wipe my eyes."i wanted papa to hear it dad",i say."i know honey",he says."always remember he's proud of you darling always,he will always be in our hearts forever",dad says to me."i love you dad",i sniffle."i love you too",he says.

"Freddie,we gotta go,we have an album to record",Roger hissed,i flip him off."leave him Rog",Brian says."let them have their moment",he added."yeah",i snarl."go",Dad says."don't wanna",i say."Freddie,if they need you,go",he says."alright......love you dad",i say."love you too",he says,kissing my forehead."jacket",he calls out."yes dad",i giggle,i kiss his cheek.

he kissed my forehead,"i don't want to hear you got in trouble",dad says,"i wont dad",i say."no dying",i say."freddie!",he says."Dad",i say.he nodded,hugged me again."be good",he says,"dad,i will,",i say.he kissed my forehead.

"love you dad so much",i giggle."love you too giggle boy",he teased,i roll my eyes.he gave me his earring,i put it in.i left with the boys,i wiped my eyes."Really Freddie?!",Roger says"shut up Roger,my dad and i have had a hard time getting over Scotty's death.be nice for once.i've had a hard time because i'm worried about my dad,i don't want to lose him too",i spat,i walked ahead of them to the station,i got on the first train to london.

I had a bad feeling,i didn't really get on the train.I went over to the mens toilets,the other three got on the train to london before realising they left me behind.I smirked and took a cab back.i paid the fare,let myself in."dad?",i say"DADDY!"i call out."anyone?Mikey!George",i call out more.Dad came downstairs,"what are you doing here?"he asked.

"couldn't bring myself to leave dad.I want to be with you nobody else",i say."Freddie,darling,i'm sure the boys need you more than i do",he says,"fuck them",i say."i want to be with you dad,just you",i say."Freddie,if they need you,go",he says,"No,i'm not leaving you dad",i say."darling,i'm fine",he says."i'm not leaving you",i say."fuck the boys who cares?!Not me,they've been rather rude lately",i say.

"Freddie,i'm okay,i don't need you to exhaust yourself worrying",he says."b but dad!i worry about you because i love you,i'd hate to lose you",i say."i know",he says.he held out his arms for me,i bolt into them,i felt him lift me up and spin me around.I squealed,he kissed my forehead."fuck the boys,they can handle a few days without me",i giggled."cheeky",dad says,"i know dad,i'm thirty seven and act like a child",i say."that's because you're mine",he says.

he hugged me as i saw George come downstairs,the music started playing,low.i wrap my arms around my dads neck,his arms wrap around me."i love you dad",i smiled."i love you too",he says.George stood in the doorway.the music kept playing,i rest my head on dads chest,listening to his breathing and heartbeat.dads hand ran through my hair,i hummed with satisfaction.he kept doing it."mm",i hummed more."you like that darling?"he asked,"a fucking lot",i say.

"mm dad",i say.he continued running his hand through my hair softly,i kept my head on his chest."i love you dad",i say."i love you too",he says,i yawned."someone's tired huh",he says,i nodded."go on to bed",he says,i do.i put on jogging bottoms,i left my top off.Dad soon came in."Night darling",he says."Night dad",i yawned.he kissed my head and turns off my light.I fell asleep that night with a smile on my face.


	3. Asshole

**_ june fifteenth 1983(Sunday) _ **

** _Freddie's p.o.v_ **

I woke up early,laid in bed for a bit.I was feeling a little sick.Dad walked in."Good Morning",he says."Morning daddy",i giggle.he hugged me,i got dressed into a jumper and jeans.I brush my teeth,gelled my hair back like i always do at age thirty seven."Morning Freddie",George says"Morning Mikey",i grin.I had breakfast,brushed my teeth again.Dad came up behind me,kissing my cheek,i giggle slightly.

"i love you too dad",i say."to much",i say."i love you to much too",he says.he peppered my cheeks in kisses,i laughed and squirmed in his hold.he kept doing it."i'm not gonna let you go",he teased,tickling my sides too.i giggled more.he kissed my cheek.I kiss dads cheek,he has the number for the studio if he needs me.

i left."i know dad,be good don't be stupid",i say,he kisses my cheek.I left for the studio,the chucked me my sunglasses.I put them on,i got on the first train to London then a cab to the studio.I paid the fare and walked into the studio."you're late!",Roger says,"i'm sorry i live so far,i live in brighton dumbass",i say."i spent the night with my dad,that's why i never showed up",i say."Freddie,you left us on the train,i saw you run back",John says,"so?i wanted a night in with my dad",i lied."liar",Roger says,"Brian love,help me",i say"love?!",Brian says,"oh so now you want to break up with me after you asked me out",i say.

"Freddie,you can't keep not coming to the studio",he says."Brian,i like to be with my dad,i spent all last night with him,i care about my dad.I worry about him,day after fucking day!",i snapped."he's my fucking dad!I deserve to be with him"i Sniffle.

"Freddie,we know you care about him",John says,"No you don't,you need a reason to go on at me!When i don't turn up,its because i'm with my dad,i worry about him all the fucking time,i don't want to fucking lose him",i say."i'm fucking leaving,don't expect to see me for a week or two",i snapped,i ran to the train station and got the first train to brighton.

It pulled it two hours later,got a taxi home.I let myself in."i'm home",i call out,"hi darling",dad says,"hi dad",i say,"what's wrong?",he asked."bad day",i say,he brought me into a hug."whats happened",he asked,"the boys,they had a go at me for worrying about you,they now want me in the studio all the time now",i sniffle.

"I'm not going for a week",i say,dad wraps his arms around me,i wrap mine around his neck.he held me in his arms.we cuddled on the sofa.Dad held me in his arms."i love you dad",i say"love you too",he says,he kept his arms around me."I i think they hate me dad",i sniffle."No,No they don't love",he says."yes they do dad,they had a go at me dad,Brian's broke up with me,",i sniffled."oh darling",he says.

I buried my face in his chest.he held me,stroking my hair.George came in."whats happened,who's upset the cutie",he says.I blushed i gave him the 'Who do you think?', look.he nodded,he sat with us,rubbing my back as well.the doorbell rang.I was still in their arms.I look up to George as a second father.....despite him being younger than me.The doorbell rang again.

"its open!",dad calls out.it was Brian,since i gave him the spare room,Dad and George share a room,not weird at all."Freddie",Brian says,i flip him off."Freddie,i want a talk",he says.i nodded,dad kisses my cheek and ruffles my hair.I went with Brian."yes?",i say."i'm sorry for being a jerk to you",he says."look at me",i say to him,he wouldn't,i cup his cheeks and kiss him.his arms wrap around me.

"i love you Freddie",he says."I love you too brian",i say.he stroked my cheek and kissed me again."I'm sorry Freddie,i didn't mean to make you upset",he says."i know Brian,it was everything getting to me at once",i say.he nodded.Dad saw us kiss."I love you i love you",i say."i love you too",Brian says,kissing me over and over.

"I'll see you tomorrow",he growled playfully.i giggle and blush.i kiss his cheek,i watched him leave."Oh my",dad smirked."don't",i say,he pulled me onto his lap and started tickling me again.It was so hard to hold back the giggles.

he knows my worst spot are my sides.he kept tickling me.he let me go."i love you dad",i say."I love you too Darling",he says."you don't have to worry about me so much",he says."Dad,you know i do",i say."i know darling,i understand its still hard for you to get over papa's passing",he says,i nodded.I went up to my room for a bit.When........"FREDDIE!",George shouts,i bolted downstairs,"Dad!",i say."S Shit",i stammered.Cardiac arrest,i started chest compressions while George called an ambulance,"please dad,don't die on me",i begged.

"I don't want to lose you too",i cried."please daddy",i say."i got a pulse!",i say.the ambulance arrived,i refused to move away from my dad.George pulled me away from it.we sat on the sofa,i was in tears."i its not fair",i say.They took dad to hospital,i went with,i held dads hand.i looked after his wedding ring.

We got to the hospital,dad was taken to resus,i was sat in the waiting room,i can't lose dad.he gives me the best cuddles on a bad day."please daddy",i sighed.The doctor came out,"is he okay?",i ask,the doctor nodded,i bolted in there,dad was awake,"Daddy",i sniffle."come here",he says.I do.he held me as i cried."shh,its okay,i'm okay darling",he soothes."Y you almost d died dad",i sniffled."don't say that",he says."i its true",i say."Freddie,darling,i'm okay,you still have me",he says.

he rubs my back softly,kissing my forehead."its alright",he says."i'm okay Freddie darling,i'll still be here",he says.he kept rubbing my back softly.i then felt a tickling sensation on my stomach."D Dad",i slightly giggled.he kept doing it."D Dad st stop it",i giggled into his shoulder.he wouldn't.he did eventually.We hugged,cuddled.

I stayed with dad for the night.

**_ June Sixteenth 1983(Monday) _ **

"Good Morning",dad whispered to me.i was curled up on the guest sofa in the room."Morning dad",i say.I put on a shirt and jeans.I helped dad get dressed.He was discharged that day.i got us a cab home."i'm okay darling",dad says."i know",i sighed,the cab pulled up,i paid the fare.I let us in."well,we're home",i say.George came running,i left them to kiss.

"Love birds",i tease.Dad smirked at me so did George,they had me pinned within a few seconds,my arms pinned above me.Dad started tickling my bare stomach as George tickled my armpits."C come on!ST stop!",i laughed."No",dad says.i threw my head side to bloody side.i try to wriggle away from it,avoiding the feather of death as dad calls it,he and papa used it to tickle me all the time when i was little.It was torture.

i felt it tickling my neck.I squealed."St stop!",i giggle,"I i'm not!a fuck child",i laughed."you act like one",dad teased.they gave me mercy so i could breathe."i love you dad",i breathe out a small giggle."i love you too darling",he says.We hugged tightly."George,you're family as well",Dad says.he joined the hug,then i was again tackled into a cuddle before being tickled again.

Dad tickled my sides.George got my ribs.they let me go,i went to make us all cups of tea,i ended up burning my hand.Dad rushed in,told me to get it under cold water,he rubs my back.he got the bandages out."it hurts",i say."i know it does",dad says.he dried off my hand carefully and wrapped it in a bandage."come here",he says,i do."you're daft Freddie",he teased,"I know dad",i smile.

Brian was outside the door."what's happened",he asked."burnt my hand Bri",i say."leave the tea making to me",dad says,poking my side,i squeaked,batting his hand away.Brian wrapped his arms around my waist,pinning me up against the wall,my legs around his waist,he cupped my cheeks.He then sweetly kissed me."i want you to Marry Me",i whisper to him.

"oh really?",he asked."WHERE'S MY WEDDING RING?!",dad yelled"i have it",i say."Why?",he asked,"l looking after it",i stammer."No excuses mister",dad grinned,he chased after me,i tripped without looking and fell face first on the floor.I groaned and rolled onto my back.Dad bent down,he moved my hands."small nosebleed",he says,i sat up against the wall,pressing a tissue to my nose.

Dad pulled my hand away from it."its fine",he rolled his eyes,kissing my cheek.I got up.Well i got down on one knee,i looked at dad as if to say 'Can i use papa's wedding ring?', he nodded,i had got a copy of it ."Brian Harold May,when we first met in 1970,my heart leaped for you but was jealous when that slut came around,will you Marry me Brian Harold May?",i proposed.

"YES I WILL!",he says,i slip the copy ring on his finger.We kissed.Dad hugged me."i'm getting married",i sigh."just like me",dad says,"proposed after a few hours of dating",he added.he cradled the back of my head,the other hand rubbing my back."i love you dad so much",i say."i love you too darling",he says.he kissed all over my face,making me giggle.

he kept doing it."Dad!",i laughed.he stopped and kissed my cheek.he tickled my sides to be annoying."Dad!",i squealed,squirming in his arms.he wouldn't stop.he had me trapped.I giggle onto his shoulder."D Dahahahd!St stap it",the laughter took over me."No",he says."i'm not gonna stop",he says,he gave in,i was panting.

he rubbed my back,it helped so could breathe."you'll always be my son",he says."I know dad,you'll always be my dad",i say and smile."i'll love you till the end",we both say at the the same time."you've grown up a lot,whatever happened to my little boy,my little shy Freddie",he says,"i'm still here dad,i've just grown,i'll always be in your heart dad,you'll always be in mine",i say,hugging him,"Awe",he cooed.

he wrapped his arms around me.he kept me in the hug."don't cry honey bear",he says,"c can't help it",i sniffle."i know",he says softly,running his hand through my hair softly.

 ** _A month later,July 3rd 1983_**

"Good Morning darling",dad says,"morning dad",i say.George is now Twenty one.We sat and had breakfast,"are you feeling okay?",dad asked,i shrug my shoulders."open wide",he says,i do,he put the thermometer in my mouth under my tongue."awe,fever 38.03C",he says,kissing my head.George came in,i picked at breakfast."back to bed",dad says,i went back to bed.

Dad came to check on me a few minutes later.he pulled back the duvet."i'm dying",i groaned."no you're not",he says."it feels like it",i say.i was sweating a lot,i pulled off my top.dad felt how hot i was.he made sure to have the duvet to my thighs."you'll be okay Freddie",he says.

he gave me a cold glass of water to drink,i downed it in a few seconds.he put a cold cloth on my forehead to bring down my temperature.He checked my temperature a few seconds after."thank god,its gone down",he says.i sat downstairs with him.

I have a blanket wrapped around me.Dad kissed my head,George came over."awe sick?",he asked me,i nodded,pouting.

That afternoon,i went to bed,i heard crying......from dads room,i went to see what happened...."W whats going on?",i stammer."i'm sorry Freddie,he's gone",George says."W what?",i say,"he's dead Freddie,he just passed",he says,i went to dad and put my hand on his heart,no heartbeat,checked for a pulse,didn't get one......." N no",i say.i teared up,George hugged me"No dad,no",i sniffled."i didn't want you to go",i say.I went downstairs and watched all the videos of papa,dad and i when i was little.Brian came in."you okay?",he asked,"No",i say quietly,"what's wrong?",he asked."Dads dead,he just died",i sniffle.Brian brought me into a hug,rubbing my back."i want dad back",i say."i want his cuddles",i sniffle."I know Freddie",Brian says.

"No,you don't!you never grew up with danny as a parent,he knew how to make me happy on a bad day,his cuddles were the best,safe and secure",i say.then George came in......i saw dad behind him."We gotcha!",Dad says,"that wasn't funny",i snarled."Really not fucking funny dad,you had me thinking you were dead!",i yelled.tears in my eyes.

he hugged me,i pulled away,"that wasn't funny dad,you've really fucking upset me",i snap."darling",he says,"don't touch me",i say,he does anyway,hugging me,he brought me into a cuddle."i'm sorry darling",he says,"me too dad",i say,he kissed my cheek.

he hugged me tightly."that wasn't funny",i sniffle,"Darling,i'm sorry",he says.he wiped my tears away.We cuddled for the evening."i love you so much dad,don't ever leave me",i say."i wont",he says.he stroked my hair softly to calm me down."its alright",he says.

he kissed my cheek."i'm not gonna leave you",he says."I'm not,i promise",he says.I nodded.he kept an arm around me.Safely."i love you so much dad to much to the moon and back",i say."I love you too,moon and back the universe anything,i wouldn't dare ever let you leave me",he says.

We hugged tightly.


End file.
